Part Two: I Allow Me to Be Me

In last month’s article we discussed the spiritual importance of allowing others to be how they are, regardless of your personal opinion on their choices. This article covers how it is equally important to allow yourself the ability to express your true self.

It takes a conscious effort to embrace an allowing that lets you express your true self, while choosing to make yourself a priority. It can be difficult, as we may put others first for so many reasons. Common reasons can vary from a fear of rejection, a need for love and acceptance, a fear of being hurt, a reason rooted in lack of self-esteem, and so much more. Each person’s reasons may be different, but the result is the same.

Allowing yourself to be a priority is an important step to self-empowerment.

If you have experienced a co-dependent relationship, you have an understanding of how it’s possible to hang your feelings of self-worth on another. For the person being cared for or told what to do, they never develop the need or motivation to grow into the empowered, dynamic person that is a reflection of who they spiritually are. For the person who is care-taking and demanding, they will deplete their energies and there will never be time to reach their full potential. They are too busy focusing on others or things outside of self to spend meaningful time with their inner-self.

Both parties need to learn why their self-image or emotional needs are wrapped up in this habit way of being. Neither side is healthy, especially long-term – and it can often take tough love and determination to change and allow your true self shine through. Each person has to learn to take responsibility and learn how to express their truest being.

Tips for inviting in change: Use this exercise by stilling yourself and then asking your heart these questions. It may be helpful to journal your answers. Don’t rush the questions, allow them to bubble from deep inside for honest answers.

Are you prone to being dependent? Why do I habitually defer to another for their direction? Why do I place their opinion about what is right for me over my own? Why do I allow someone to bail me out or be in charge of me?

Acknowledge how your beliefs and self-image are subconsciously wrapped up in this pattern of being. Try to uncover the root that is driving this pattern whether is it feelings of being less than, fear of failure, avoidance of responsibility, or something else that is preventing you from following you heartfelt instincts.

Are you prone to being in charge? Why do I have this need to take over someone else’s choices and actions? Why can’t I trust that their choice is valid? Why do I feel my way is always better?

Acknowledge how your beliefs and self-image are subconsciously wrapped up in this pattern of being. Find the root of the pattern whether it feels like a requirement for love, a shield for knowing yourself better, a desire to always be in control, or something else that is preventing you from following you heartfelt instincts.

Whatever you discover in either scenario, make a commitment to change. Work towards change with small decisions and living in the moment evaluating your choices. Let your choices be conscious ones instead of pattern-driven auto pilot. This is how you lay the groundwork to become all you are meant to be!

The real you, the spiritual divine being inside of your body, has all the knowledge, skills, and wisdom needed to be successful in all areas of your life. These patterns are limitations that develop over time and prevent the real you from being present. We can fully allow our real selves into the present when we are able to remove our built up limitations.

As you move towards allowing your true self to be present, you may discover a new dilemma. Where does the line between being frozen without forward movement and forcing movement into the world lie? How astute are you at allowing the world unfold? It can take practice to understand what allowing feels like, but if you embrace the rigid energies of frozen/force it is impossible for the flow of abundance, healing, or a loving relationship to enter.

It is important to move out of frozen/force and into the flow of allowing. Once you do, God and the Universe bring wonderful gifts. These gifts are often out of reach when you try so hard to make things or yourself be a certain way. Allow yourself to be how you need to be in each moment, it is the highest, best, and most peaceful way to live. It brings balance and harmony to all.

Allow yourself to be restructured. Don’t fight or resist these changes, but embrace them fully. Encourage all parts of self to allow the changes to happen: ‘I am empowered. I have what it takes to be successful. I put myself first. I love and embrace myself, even when I make a mistake.’ (We all make mistakes; it is why all our devices have a delete button!)

Allowing your inner-self to be outwards isn’t easy to accomplish, in fact it is a spiritual mastery point. Even if the concept feels easy – it requires time, focus, and commitment to operate from this type of personal allowing on a daily basis. Know that it is possible and worth the commitment. If you are serious about changing your patterns and are motivated to monitor yourself, you will love the self-confidence, freedom, and joy that comes when you allow yourself the ability to express your true self.